Oyetola, keeping Osun satisfied and asking for more
By Funke Egbemode
It’s good for a man to know where he’s going and how to get there. It’s even better for him to know the route, the shortcuts, that lead to his destination. Better still, it is important for a man to have the right tools and know how to deploy it. That is why I have always advocated that every man should know his tool, how to use it to the best of his ability especially behind closed doors. Are you confused?
See, those who know me know that I’m the Joint National Assembly Chairman of Intimate Affairs Committee. In perpetuity too. Oh yes and don’t stress yourself asking when I assumed duty or who elected me. Some things are better accepted than queried.
Back to the point, every man should know how to please his woman or women. Every man should know his tool and give a good account of himself as the man in his wife’s or woman’s life. Every smart man should know that it’s not by size or length that a woman is satisfied. It is by mastery and expertise with which the tool is used. Ah, you are getting my drift?
As a wise woman said (not every wise saying was said by a man, please); it is what the gods endowed a man with that he will use to put his woman to sleep. If he knows its use, that is. In other words, it could be long and useless or short and useful.
“Ohun ti eniyan ba ni lo fi n kun Iyawo re loorun.”
That said and established, let me quickly say that this is not about the National Assembly Committee on Intimate Affairs per se. It is about knowing how to use what you have to achieve maximum performance. It is about not quarrelling with your tool which is what lazy folks do. It is about finishing what you start. It is about making small things perform optimally. It is about flagging off a project and commissioning it in record time.
It is about not leaving your partner halfway to paradise. Some men are guilty of this serious offense. They start the show and end it before ‘Madam’ can say ‘ooohhh.’ Women, we hate it so, so much. Even if your woman smiles after the ‘ceremony,’ trust me, leaving her halfway to paradise is frustrating. A good man should not flag off what he can’t commission.
Are you following my logic? This is about Governor Adegboyega Oyetola, the Oko Ilu of Osun, the man wey sabi road. He knew what he signed up for. He knew the tool handed over to him was less than good and not likely to go far. Lean purse, burdened by huge debts.
Add that to a party’s waning popularity because of slashed salaries. Many of us shook our heads when he was sworn in. How is the man going to navigate those landmines? But he shocked all of us, pleasantly though.
Good leaders do not drive while fixated on the rear view mirror. They do not look at lean purses and make long speeches on why they can’t perform. They make do with what they have.
That’s what Mr Oyetola did, is doing and will continue to do. He didn’t quarrel with the defective tool that was passed on to him. He didn’t draw up a list of excuses on why the lean purse full of holes would not allow him deliver on his electoral promises. He didn’t leave us high and dry and regretting our choice. He rolled up his sleeves, took the leaking purse and set about doing what a good husband should and must do to satisfy his wife. He is the husband of Osun. Not the goddess o. The state, please.
Oyetola, the Lion King of Osun focused on the job of making his new wife happy. Oh, and is she happy? She is ecstatic. Here’s how.
Mr Governor has fixed the holes in the Osun lean purse. He is holding the lean purse and constantly checking that the contents are not being tampered with. He has found ways to increase the contents of the purse while doing magical things with all the help he can summon to fix the state.
Now, no matter how rich a man is, if his wife is constantly left halfway to paradise, unfulfilled, unsatisfied, she will start admiring other men and soon after that, his children will start looking like his gateman or driver.
Don’t ask me for details. This is still the holy month!
Take a look at Oko Ilu’s projects. Make a list of the number of projects he has flagged off and commissioned. You can write a book on promises made and delivered by Governor Oyetola. And it is not even four years yet.
He said he’d take a second look at the warped education policy he inherited. He fixed it to the satisfaction of Osun people. He promised he’d end the salary drought. He did. He promised a healthy sector reform. He has delivered. He said he’d change our economic story and he’s well on his way to refocus and diversify the economy.
Don’t we have a functional gold refinery? Is Osun not the third on the list of Capital Investment Destination in Nigeria? I mean if Osun is ranked next to Abuja (which is not a State) and Lagos (which has all the advantages of a full-fledged county), if you ask me, Osun is the first state on that Capital Investment Destination Ranking. From lean leaking purse to that height, the new wife is grinning from ear to ear like the cat that got the milk.
Oyetola, Ekun Oko ilu that he is, the royal satisfying husband of Osun, flagged off Alekuwodo network of roads and commissioned them. Ada-Igbajo road he started and completed. Osogbo-Kelebe-Iragbiji Road, signed, sealed and delivered.
Ara-Ejigbo Road? Done and delivered. And then the Olaiya Flyover in Osogbo. Tell me how many states with lean leaking purses and debt hanging over them like the sword of Damocles start and finish a flyover in 13 months while still picking all its bills. Helloo?
If a man is good, let us laud him. This one is keeping Osun satisfied, happy and asking for more.
