My wife sneaks out at night to sleep with men — Husband

By Opeyemi Matanmi

The expectation of many from marriage union is to have a better life of sweet experience. Many who enter into marriage union in the Nigerian society consciously do so with meticulousness in line with the desire and expectation of good fortune in future.

Since many in the African setting see marriage as a life long journey, they are very cautious in the process of choosing a wife in many instances.

The latter case was not the testimony of Mr. Kazeem Ajayi, a middle age in his forties. All indications and surrounding circumstances have  shown that things are not in any way rosy for the gentle manager of a paint factory since he got married to his wife who he described as a ‘living monster’.

To Kazeem, his marriage to his wife, Jumoke, has done nothing but to worsen condition for him. The depressed man lamented his marriage to the daughter of a retired soldier as a “bad luck” that has brought  disorder to his life.

Kazeem who divorced his wife recently revealed that she gave birth to a baby boy for another man few months after he sent her packing.

Kazeem had to take the courageous decision in dragging the bull by the horn to send his wife off his home after he had done serious calculation to discover his wife was pregnant with the child of another man in their home.

Jumoke who was sent packing directly resumed in the house of another man where she put to birth six months after leaving her husband’s home.

The narrative of Kazeem’s ordeal has  shown that he was in no way fortunate enough to have avoided or to say, escape an engagement with a wrong partner.

According to Kazeem, the woes of his misfortune began even as early as the day of their marriage ceremony at the marriage reception. On the fateful day, three friends of the bride (Jumoke) had appeared at the reception during the ceremony to bring a news which turned the sumptuous meal in the mouth of many well wishers to a sup of herb.

The friends who stormed the wedding ceremony from Benin Republic, arrived aggressively violent at the reception hall to protest against the new bride shouting “who do you think will help you in looking after the children you left behind in Benin?. Nobody will do that for you.”

They were ranting so vehemently that the attention of every one at the reception ground was quickly diverted towards what was unfolding. Confusion filled the air as in-laws from both sides began biting fingers.

To Kazeem, he had to clear his face with hands as a drunken man who had just woken from a deep sleep after intoxication.

According to Kazeem, despite this catastrophic revelation, going back at that point was considered too late. In his good heart he continued, bringing her into their new home with the hope that nonetheless the nauseating discovery, something good would still come out of the union. The cord of affection seemed still very strong, a force pulling him through to ignore whatever must have been the case.

Indications started proving the fact that Kazeem had entered into an incongruously wrong union when he started noticing traces of infidelity on the part of his wife.

This according to him is one among many other trouble-setting behaviors of his estranged wife.  “Apart from her sleeping with other men which I discovered, she manifest other bad behaviours that are destabilizing and very annoying which can put one off balance,” Kazeem said regrettably.

However to Kazeem, the most destabilizing conduct of his estranged wife to him was her infidelity in their union. Things got worse for Kazeem one night when his wife started the act of sneaking out of their home to go out at night after his attempt to keep the gate locked to prevent her from going out.

Kazeem had been hinted by some concerned persons who revealed to him that his wife had been engaging in extra marital affairs.

Those who had been noticing her movement had told Kazeem that his wife had been visiting the homes of secret lovers as against her excuse of going to night vigils. “I began to suspect when even on weekly days, not Fridays, she would still say she was going to church at night.

What my mind was telling me was proven when some people confirmed to me that they have been seeing my wife at corridors of other men’s house. I couldn’t but believe this until when I began to see her with my own eyes.”

The depression Kazeem is going through has been exacerbated with a doubt of whether the two children his estranged wife had in his home are really his. “I don’t want to go further to confirm whether the children I’ve been investing on are mine. This will make things worse because how am I sure I am the true father?” He queried.

Kazeem whose life had been a bed of roses before his marriage to his estranged wife, now sees marriage as a cup of herb which has placed his life in shambles.

The phenomenon of marriage to kazeem is not perceived in any way as a bag of goodies. Kazeem who does not want to admit there were stones he left unturned before embarking into the union, now sees marriage as a burden and a union of toleration.

“In beauty, she is very beautiful and smart, but how can you imagine her sleeping around. That’s my major problem with her. Apart from that, she has other bad characters. But I am less concerned about all that. My main issue is the extra marital affairs. To me marriage is not something very sweet as people used to think and say,”  Kazeem lamented.

The depression of Kazeem had left him with no other choice than to put away his wife and is now in doubt of getting a peaceful home that may restore his happiness if married to another wife.